Down and Out How Misperception Spirals
May 25, 2024
In the previous module (this blog is the transcript of module 2 of the 10-module Surviving to Thriving Pathway online course which is comprised of ten, ten-minute videos), we introduced the "survival mode", touched briefly on the thriving mode, and I shared with you that I would next be presenting about how quickly and easily things can spiral out of control when viewing life through the survival mode.
But first, a little more background.
Surviving can become our standard mode of being, the perceptual lens through which we filter all present-moment stimuli, generating our lived experience. Believe it or not, we do not experience reality directly, but rather our perception of it. When living in survival this is unfortunate because the surviving mode has a built-in negativity bias.
Minds dominated by survival mode seek to continually justify “the reasons” why we are suffering and we filter all experiences through the “half empty” lens of “what can go wrong, will go wrong.” 

When this default mode is ON, we live our lives defensively, closed, and reactive, instead of confidently, open, and creative (thriving mode).
The surviving mode has no concern for our “happiness” or emotional well-being. In fact, the brain we were born with, I could argue, is designed to be UNhappy... Look around: how many people do you that ARE, actually, HAPPY? Perhaps it makes sense to you, then, when I say we are designed this way by default. Thankfully, that doesn't mean we need to settle for this normal fate.
Before we get to discussing the thriving mode capacity we all have the potential to activate, it is important to hammer home that the default mode of our brain has survival as a priority. It is not usually until we are utterly convinced of this that we are willing to do the work to upgrade our mode of being from surviving mode to thriving mode.

Until we do this DELIBERATE work, most of us are stuck hoping this or that experience or success will finally make us happy.
The brain in survival mode is designed to make us assume the stick is a snake. When, in actual FACT, it is a stick. This stick/stake analogous misperception applies to everything! The way we interpret tones of voice, looks, our neighbor's intentions, our spouse's headache, the gurgle in our belly, etc.
When we are in survival mode, which for many of us is OFTEN/most of the time (i.e. any time we are upset, or “stressed out”) we do NOT perceive things ACCURATELY.
I just want to pause there for a moment to make sure that sets in... We do not perceive things accurately and we can't not rely on our "gut" instincts.
This is such an important concept and so contrary to what we've been taught that I made a video on my YouTube channel explaining: Real Intuition vs Our "Instincts" that Lie to Us.
Like this content, but want to go deeper?
Subscribe to Premium Blog ContentWhen we are upset for any reason - valid or otherwise - or when we are “stressed out” for any reason - valid or otherwise - we are activating that part of our brain that is designed to help us survive a tiger jumping at our throat - NOW.
We see, taste, feel, and “KNOW” “our truth” that the stick is a snake when it is ACTUALLY a stick.

We are convinced we are absolutely right, and all the “reasons” why we are upset about anything and everything, are the real and actual reasons why we are upset. In fact, we don’t even consider whether we are “right” or “wrong” - it's just the way things ARE. 

After all, “It's my TRUTH,” isn’t it?
This is not our fault. Our brains were born this way. But if we want to a better life, it is our responsibility, to train our brain or remain the same.
The brain in thriving mode, on the other hand, makes more accurate contact with what is actually the case. It doesn’t treat the stick as a feather, and it doesn’t react to the stick as if it is a snake, so we can choose based on accurate perception to walk by the stick and leave it alone, pick it up and build a fort with it, or jump back from the snake if that's what's needed.
Unless the saber-tooth tiger is breathing down our necks, surviving mode unnecessarily reeks all sorts of havoc with intertwining layers of complex justifications.
A useful theory suggests that this more primitive part of our brain evolved when threats to our safety were primarily physical and required immediate and conclusive reactions to secure our short-term survival.
We didn’t live nearly as long, for many reasons, so it wasn’t as big a deal that we burnt ourselves out in survival mode… we weren’t trying to keep our crackers until our 80’s and 90’s.
Nowadays, for many of us, our primary “threats” are emotional, “mental” and social.

Employing the surviving mode’s only options of fighting, running away, and hiding usually makes things worse and leaves us with scant neurological architecture to experience the safety, connection, inspiration, joy, and love we all desire.
We are living longer and this isn’t often going well for a lot of us. Survival mode takes its TOLL and too many people are going to their deathbed in physical, mental and emotional turmoil. We are losing sight of our natural potential to die of old age, healthy, at peace, surrounded by loved ones, sharp in our mental faculties, and happy.
For most of us who are safe on a day-to-day basis, have enough food, clean water, etc, surviving mode is mostly unnecessary. It is useful when this system takes over to have us instinctually slam the breaks when a kid chases a ball in front of our car. But if you think about every moment we would label our experience as "stressful" and how rare those moments are actually life-threatening you might get a sense of how often we are biologically overreacting. I go into these dynamics in detail in "The Origin of ALL Disease and Suffering."
I WANT TO EMPHASIZE THAT THIS IS COMMON. IT IS “NORMAL”. LOOK AROUND. 

If you are regularly “upset” or “stressed out” then you are activating the aspects of your brain and body that are meant to save your life from imminent danger. Your story is "I am frustrated by the traffic". Your body is saying, "I need to mobilize every available energy to save my life from whatever is trying to kill me."
Living in survival mode day in and day out not only robs us of the quality of life we wish to experience now, but it also does real, serious damage to our bodies and minds.
One of the most essential choices we can make is to TRAIN OUR BRAIN to enjoy a new default mode: to live most of our lives in THRIVING MODE and to activate survival mode only briefly, when it is actually needed, i.e. when there is a real danger.
For now, can you see how quickly and easily and justifiable this can all spiral out of control?
The surviving mode turned on too much, too often or all the time is the origin of all suffering and physical, mental, and emotional disease.
No exaggeration.
In the next module, we will get even more specific about what happens in our body-mind when the survival mode is activated so that you can recognize all the signs and symptoms that can, instead, now point you in a new and better direction than the misperception spiral: down and out.
Take the Surviving to Thriving Pathway
If you want to go a bit further in this work, check out the Surviving to Thriving Pathway, for 10, 10-minute videos with written summaries delivered to your email that will give you the foundation you need to heal and thrive.
Check out our YouTube channel: @ATAtherapytools
